Hi, it’s me Willow, the tripawd Labrador, here again. You know that saying “if you’re in a hole, stop digging”? It’s true, you see I was literally in a hole and yes, I should have stopped digging. And now because of that I’m in the dog house. And my humans think they have enough evidence – hmm, but I have the ultimate rebuttal. And here is my defence.
You see I used to have a friend who loved to dig. She left holes all-round the garden – I think she called them booby traps. Anyway, my hudad decided to tidy up the garden and has done loads. But this week it was removing old rosa Ragusa bushes and removing all the dockens, grass and anything else that grew. And now it’s all bare ground. But he did something terrible – he filled in the holes!
So my friends “ghost” came back and decided to re-instate the holes. You know the one, the same “ghost” that pushed me off the settee when I was lying in my friends favourite spot.
Now, my humum seems to think it was me that did the digging. Well, show me the evidence I say. Ahh. Well, yes, that’s correct I was in the garden at the time it got dug – I’ll grant you that. But you can’t prove it was me that did the digging.
Yes, my paws are very dirty and covered in gutters. As were yours when you went over to “inspect” the damage.
Yes, I know that there’s considerably more gutters on my front paws compared to my back one. But if you think about it, when I walk I have to put lots more weight on my front paws than on my back one – so they just went further into the mud. It had nothing to do with digging.
And, my final ultimate rebuttal? How could I, with only three legs dig a hole like that? I need to balance with all 3 legs, so if I was using my front 2 legs for digging that would mean I was standing on one leg. Dear humum, do you really think I could do that?
So, there you go, all my evidence presented. Case closed. I’m INNOCENT!